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Baby's first Christmas
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by
Hilary Pereira
Christmas is a time for family rituals, and when better to start
some traditions of your own than your first Christmas with your
new baby?
If you're facing your first Christmas as a parent, prepare to wave
goodbye to the old festive traditions. Wild Christmas parties and
spare cash for luxurious gifts may be a fading memory, but take
heart - for every sacrifice there's at least one bonus to be had.
The ghost of Christmas past
Think back to Christmases past and you may remember partying until
dawn, shopping 'til you dropped and competing with your partner
to choose the most lavish and original present. You had the time,
money and energy to face the High Street Christmas crowds, and you
could juggle your social life and job. This year, in between feeds
and nappy changes, you may feel a yearning for some of the activities
that made Christmas fun. And that's ok. Your first Christmas with
a new baby is an important developmental milestone for you as a
parent and, as with most milestones, it may feel like a mixed blessing.
New traditions for a new family
It's true that you have different priorities but that doesn't mean
that all the fun has gone out of the festive season. Far from it!
This year you'll have every excuse to shop by mail order and the
easy option of giving all your friends a framed photo of your beautiful
new babe. You have the perfect excuse to avoid office parties and
awkward get-togethers plus you can reasonably demand any number
of luxury gifts - you deserve to be pampered after bringing a new
baby into the world.
Santa's coming back into your life, too, and he's here to stay
for at least the first five years of your child's life, so the magical
quality of Christmas is set to return. You might find yourself reliving
all the excitement of your own childhood as you hang your baby's
stocking up on Christmas Eve. You'll have a perfect excuse to stick
your nose into every Santa's Grotto you come across, and you'll
appreciate just how much your own parents used to put into planning
Christmas for you. It's also a chance to lay down some new traditions
that can be unique to your new family. Need some ideas? Check out
some of the family traditions other iVillagers remember from their
childhood.
Where to spend Christmas?
Whether you have different sets of grandparents fighting to get
their hands on their new grandchild or everyone is keeping a safe
distance, make sure you're firm in getting the Christmas you want.
Maybe this year is the perfect year to invite the family over to
your house. It saves you rushing around the country with a new baby
and it's much easier and more relaxing caring for your child in
your own home.
If you're doing the entertaining, no one will bemoan the fact that
the closest you'll come to presenting your own Christmas pud is
popping into M&S to buy it. Ask everyone to muck in and bring
part of the Christmas dinner with them - you don't have to be a
domestic goddess, most of the family will be delighted with the
opportunity to help out.
See if your parents or in-laws would like to babysit while you
spend a bit of quality time alone with your partner. Don't feel
too guilty about asking - they're probably itching to get their
hands on your baby and will regard their new grandchild as the greatest
gift of all. You may not be able to hell-raise, but a few glasses
of port and a cosy, uninterrupted chat will probably be very welcome
this year.
Because it's worth it
Of course, it's perfectly natural to long for an opportunity to
sneak down to the pub on Boxing Day evening or to sit up drinking
Baileys and watching It's a Wonderful Life until dangerously late
at night - you may be a mum, but you're still only human after all.
Just as giving up work for a while and ploughing all your spare
pennies into goodies for your baby may be hard adjustments to make
and accept, so are needing to get to bed earlier and feeling like
the odd one out at this festive time.
But take heart: this first Christmas will probably be your most
self-sacrificing, especially if you're breastfeeding or your baby
is a poor sleeper. You may be filling your dustbin with more nappy
sacks than Christmas wrap this year, but you'll be able to redress
the balance with every year to come. Next year you may feel confident
enough to get a babysitter during the party season. Chances are
you'd have already suffered most of the major expenses that having
a new baby entails - cot, highchair, car seat, pram/pushchair and
a whole new wardrobe. You're more likely to have trimmed back to
your pre-pregnancy size, too (or as close to it as is really reasonable!),
and you may just be ready to regain a bit of the old you.
Yes, this Christmas may be a completely different experience from
all previous years, but has life really ever been better?
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